


Silent night

by SlyKing



Series: Winter Prompt Challenge [1]
Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Introspection, Kisses, M/M, Mistletoe, POV Jimmy, Period-Typical Homophobia, Prompt Fic, Winter, Winter Prompt fic challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:49:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27865645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlyKing/pseuds/SlyKing
Summary: Where Jimmy doesn’t like the festive season and Thomas gives him a reason to smile again.
Relationships: Thomas Barrow/Jimmy Kent
Series: Winter Prompt Challenge [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2040085
Kudos: 21





	Silent night

**Author's Note:**

> Winter Prompt Challenge on the tumblr of [witcher and his bard](https://witcher-and-his-bard.tumblr.com/post/634710612632551424/winter-prompt-challenge-i-wanted-to-make-a)  
> 1.Mistletoe
> 
> English is NOT my first langage!
> 
> Sorry for the grammar or conjugation errors that may result... Feel free to report any mistake! :)
> 
> Comments always make me extremely happy! ❤

It wasn’t Jimmy’s first Christmas at Downton. This period was always very eventful, brought a particularly tedious work and left little time to think about other things, and to entertain even less. Jimmy couldn’t say he loved Christmas, not particularly. He didn’t have a family to celebrate the holidays with, and even before that, it wasn’t his cup of tea. It was cold, and he understood neither the beauty, nor the joy, nor the comfort that people could find there.

Fortunately, the period was coming to an end. There were only a few big days left and everything would return to normal. He hoped to rest a little, find time to play the piano, hang out with Thomas after lunch, play cards with him, share a cigarette. Things that this stupid time didn’t allow.

The house was still decorated; in the large hall the tree stood proudly, dressed with all its Christmas ornaments: garlands, red and silver balls, cherubs and stars. The staircase was covered with tree crowns, holly and mistletoe.

“Jimmy.”

Thomas' voice drew Jimmy from his reverie. He turned his head toward the under-butler and nodded formally as his friend silently pushed him back to work. Behind his distant and professional air, the young footman could see a slight restlessness; an eyebrow barely raised, a glimmer in the eye. Jimmy shook his head, as if to assure him he had nothing to worry about, and went down to the kitchen to fetch the tea to be served.

It had been almost six months since the relationship between Thomas and him had evolved. It was strange and yet Jimmy felt happy. A feeling he was not really used to, he was always so carefree, so quick to have fun. He had never thought about love. With a man even less… Or at least he had managed to persuade himself otherwise. But Thomas was.... It was just Thomas. He had made Jimmy so special, so exceptional. The only one who could snatch a smile from him, to make him almost kind, almost tender. It was a little pride to be in the center of such attention. And ever since Jimmy turned his feelings on him Thomas had been opening up day by day. To him, mainly, but also to the other members of the staff who were surprised by his sympathy. Nobody knew, for them, of course. Some may have had doubts (like Mrs.Huges or Anna), but the others did not care about them, and Jmmy was delighted.

Of course, being in a relationship with a man, having feelings for a man, brought his share of injustices. Jimmy discovered them as he went along. They could not have a tender gesture in public, could only look at themselves as two friends (close friends, of course, but friends), could not consider either life with two or marriage. Their union was criminal, outlaw. They just loved each other, didn’t they? It was a love of the shadows, a secret love, a love that we did not talk about, that we could not talk about. If it suited Jimmy most of the time, to keep it to themselves, and only to them, he sometimes felt like he was doing something wrong, and that the whole relationship was clouded. He understood better Thomas who was always on the alert, who always looked over his shoulder, always ready to put himself on the defensive.

“Jimmy! Are you dreaming or what?”

This time it was the voice of Mrs. Patemore. Jimmy blinked several times before shaking his head. The cook rolled her eyes before giving her the tray, the cups and the teapot.

“Try not to get lost on the road! You really seem to be in the moon today!”

Jimmy mumbled a few words before going up the stairs and finishing his day on duty.

At night he ate on the run. He felt the presence of Thomas beside him but did not dare to look at him, as if his thoughts of the day detested his mood. Suddenly sullen, he had only one desire: to go to sleep and start a new day. He drank a sip of tea at the end of the meal and watched Thomas get up to smoke a cigarette. Their eyes crossed for a moment, the under-butler visibly waiting for him to join him. A slight sigh came from Jimmy’s lips, who finished his tea and wrapped a scarf around his neck before going out.

"It’s colder than in Siberia!" he complained, joining his lover in the backyard. "You had to go out to smoke?'

Thomas placed his eyes on him and a very light smile stretched the corner of his lips. Without removing his cigarette from his mouth, he approached Jimmy and put his scarf back in place so that it would keep him warmer.

"If you dressed properly, you wouldn’t be cold," he remarked. 

Jimmy shrugged his shoulders but Thomas' closeness was already warming him up. He breathed a sigh before passing a hand in his hair to throw a few blond strands back.

“Yeah, maybe. I’m looking forward to the end of this period.”

Thomas merely nodded without commenting. He simply observed him in silence, as if waiting for answers without asking any questions. Jimmy dipped his hands into the pockets of his pants.

"If you have nothing to say to me, I’d better go home," Jimmy muttered.

Thomas blew the smoke from his cigarette and put his free hand on Jimmy’s arm. Jimmy looked at him. He looked sad, worried and tense. Emotions that he did not try to hide from him, they were there, offered on a silver platter. And Jimmy knew how rare it was for Thomas to let anyone see behind his sarcastic cold mask. Jimmy swallowed and sighed again.

“It’s just … I don’t like the holidays. Even when my family was alive, I mean, I always thought it was, you know, just a facade to cover up everything else. We sing, we eat, we make peace but … These are just excuses. Anyway, I didn’t mind before. But now that I have no one, I don’t really see the point. Except for drinking, perhaps,” he added with a small cheeky smile.  
“I like the holidays.” 

Jimmy was surprised.

“You, Mr. Barrow?”

Thomas smiled at him with amusement, an eyebrow raised.

“Well, what? Don’t look so surprised. This is the only time of year when people try to be sincere, whether they are or not. They want to do something good. I don’t know. It may have always brought me some comfort, who knows. And then…”

Thomas gave him an uncertain, almost distrustful look, and he did not finish his sentence. He merely looked away and took another puff of cigarette.

"And then?" asked Jimmy.  
“Nothing, forget it.”

Jimmy came a little closer to him. Their shoulders almost touched as they stood there, side by side, in silence.

"I wish I could …" murmured Jimmy by clearing his throat. "...Don’t be in the shadows with you." He ends sadly before turning his head.

He was not good at talking about these things, about feelings, love, and all. Jimmy, he lived. He knew how to do that, often impulsive, often impatient. He did not think much before taking action. And he didn’t like to put words in it. Even less for things that made him feel stupid. But you feel stupid in love, don’t you?

Suddenly, Thomas' free hand was on his cheek, forcing him to straighten his head and cross his eyes. That sweet look that was intended only for him. A tender look, a slightly amused look too, and deeply moved, touched. Jimmy glanced at a smile. Thomas leaned over him and laid a quick kiss on his lips; quick but full of emotion.

"One day, perhaps," murmured Thomas against his mouth. "One day."

Jimmy nodded. They reluctantly walked away from each other before Thomas threw his cigarette at his feet. They both remained silent for a few more minutes, then returned to the interior.

That night, Jimmy dreamed of Thomas lying under a snowy tree, his hair covered with white stars.

The next day, Jimmy felt a little more fit, less gloomy. He came down much earlier than usual, almost before the cooking girl was up herself. He met her on the stairs and she glanced at her. He gave her a big smile before going into the kitchen. Mrs. Patmore was there, she took care of the breakfast for the floor and for the staff. He stole a cake and went back to the pantry. The place was deserted, it was rare. It was still cold, the fireplace had just been lit. Jimmy put on gloves and nibbled at his piece of cake while waiting for others to join him.

To his great satisfaction, Thomas was the first to descend. The under-butler glanced at him, but it seemed to please him. Jimmy winked at him.

“Slept well, Mr. Barrow?”  
"All right… You look a lot better! I don’t think I’ve ever seen you come down so early."  
“Well, as my mother used to say: a good night’s sleep and you’re off to a good start.”  
“Really?”  
“No, she didn’t say that at all. But it’s still true.”

Thomas smiled at him and crossed the distance between them. He pushed Jimmy a little further into the room and laid a kiss on his lips. Jimmy’s heart would probably explode. He closed his eyes, his hands on the arms of his lover. He did not push him away, but his ears buzzed; _If anyone comes… If anyone comes..._ He felt Thomas' forehead against his own, a hand stroking his hair, his cheek. Then something tickled his nose. He opened his eyes again and stared at the mistletoe branch that Thomas held out to him. He blinked, perplexed.

"It’s a tradition, it seems," said Thomas gently. "Kissing under the mistletoe brings good luck. I wanted to give it to you later, but... since you’re here early."

Thomas gave him a soft and tender look, then he pulled out a chair and sat down at the table to light a cigarette, as if nothing had happened, as if everything was normal. There was no one in the service, of course, but Jimmy finally felt that he could love without fear, none. Thomas had kissed him without showing any sign of anxiety. He didn’t look over his shoulder, he didn’t do it anymore as he was shooting his cigarette. He looked relaxed, peaceful, and satisfied too. Jimmy fell down beside him and laughed.

“Luck, huh? I already feel very lucky.” 

Thomas turned his head towards him, an expression so naked on his face radiating an almost broken hope. Jimmy approached him, put his hand on his cheek and kissed him in turn. It was a quick kiss, almost stolen, but a kiss all the same.

Jimmy hung the mistletoe branch on Thomas’s buttonhole.

“Good luck to you, Mr. Barrow.”  
“I think I already have a lot too.”

Under the table they put their hands together.


End file.
